17 Once-Common Courting Rituals That Would Be Viewed as Highly Problematic by Modern Standards
Today’s complicated dating environment has us wondering how courting was done in the olden days when it wasn’t this confusing and challenging. But everything old is not always gold. Some old rituals might be considered archaic or too conservative in our modern landscape. This article delves into 17 once-common courting rituals that have become increasingly controversial in contemporary society.
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Ancient Courtship
In ancient times, many recorded early marriages were by capture and not by choice. Due to the scarce supply of nubile women, men often raided other villages for potential vivas. The couple then had to go into hiding as the villagers went looking for the abducted woman. Arranged marriages were also common, primarily for fulfilling a business desire or for property or political alliance. Abduction would not be appreciated in the 21st century.
Medieval Courtship
Even though the notion of love found its seeds for growth in medieval times, it was still not considered a prerequisite for arranged marriages. Women’s virtue and honor were regarded as highly virtuous. Women also had no right to even propose for marriage. With all these notions now widely unacceptable, medieval courtship would have difficulty fitting into this modern scenario.
Victorian Courtship
Romantic love gained much popularity during the formal Victorian era. An interested gentleman still couldn’t just walk up to the girl and start a conversation, as is very common in our modern dating scenarios. If the gentleman wished to escort the lady, he had to present her with his card, and at the end of the evening, the girl could choose from her various options to escort her. Most of the courting happened at the girl’s place, under the watchful eye of her parents. This courting style is better off being told in stories.
Nordic Courtship
In certain Nordic countries, there are unique courtship traditions involving knives. In Finland, for instance, when a young woman reaches her marriageable age, her father would signal her availability. The woman would then wear a belt with an empty sheath on it. A potential suitor would place a puukko knife in the sheath if interested. The woman could accept the gesture by keeping the knife if she reciprocated his interest. This ritual, if revived, would make going to the office extremely difficult.
Bundling Courtship
During the 16th and 17th centuries in Europe and America, bundling was widespread. It involved courting couples sharing a bed while fully clothed, often with a “bundling board” or a bolster cover separating them, particularly over the girl’s legs. The purpose was to provide a safe and warm environment for the couple to converse and become acquainted within the girl’s home. Though nothing is inherently wrong with the practice, it would not be deemed fit in modern times.
European Courtship
In some areas of 18th-century Europe, breaking a biscuit or a small loaf of bread was customary over the bride’s head as she exited the church after the wedding ceremony. Unmarried attendees eagerly scrambled for the pieces, which they tucked under their pillows in hopes of dreaming about their future spouse.
Handfasting Courtship
While handfasting, a Celtic tradition of binding couples’ hands with a cord, may seem romantic, its historical context includes instances where couples were bound against their will or without complete consent.
Dowry Marriages
Historically, dowries were given by the bride’s family to the groom’s family as part of the marriage contract. Due to its highly problematic nature, this practice commodified women and is now strictly criminalized by law in various countries.
Love Potions and Charms
Historical accounts include using love potions and charms to manipulate romantic feelings or attract a desired partner. Although oddly romantic and charming, some things are better left in fantasy and imagination.
Clandestine Courtship
In eras when parental approval was paramount, clandestine courtships often required couples to engage in secretive and deceptive behavior to pursue their romantic interests. While romanticized in literature, these clandestine relationships were fraught with risks and challenges.
Blackening of the Bride
In a peculiar Scottish pre-wedding custom, the bride-to-be, and occasionally her groom, endured a procession through the streets where they were bombarded with various unpleasant items ranging from rotten eggs to sticky treacle and fish. This ritual is believed to toughen the couple for the challenges of married life. Gross would be an understatement to describe it.
Whales Tooth Gifts
Finding the ideal wedding gift might seem daunting, but Fiji has found the perfect solution, as old traditions dictate that when a man proposes marriage, he must present his prospective father-in-law with a tabua, a tooth from a sperm whale. This custom added a unique challenge, as it symbolized the depth of one’s commitment by requiring the daring act of diving deep into the ocean to confront one of the largest mammals on Earth. If revived today, this tradition would surely come under scrutiny for animal cruelty.
Love Spoons in Wales
Imagine wearing a spoon around your neck to a meeting. Weird right? So was this old Welsh custom, in which a suitor presented their beloved with an intricately carved wooden spoon, symbolizing his commitment to nourish and care for them always. The spoon was returned if the feelings were not mutual, which could be a bit awkward. However, if the affection were reciprocated, the beloved would wear the spoon around their neck for a designated period, signifying the success of their courtship. This Welsh tradition added a whole new meaning to the concept of spooning.
Mt Hagen Sing-sings
In the dense jungles of Papua New Guinea, a vibrant spectacle of color, sound, and romance used to unfold as tribesmen adorned themselves with intricate body paint and feathered attire to court potential partners. Known as sing-sings, these ceremonies were a captivating display of spiritual mimicry, with tribesmen emulating the courtship rituals of male birds of paradise. Through this exhibition of affection, they sought to capture the hearts of their desired mates.
Frances’s Toilet Tradition
In a bizarre and somewhat disgusting tradition, French newlyweds were once required to drink the remnants of their wedding celebration from a toilet bowl. Thankfully, this custom has largely faded away. However, you might still encounter couples indulging in chocolates and champagne from a replica toilet bowl as a quirky nod to the old tradition. How bizarre!
Harana
Harana, a traditional courtship custom in the Philippines, involved men serenading women beneath their windows at night to introduce themselves or express affection. This practice was prevalent in the historical Philippines and adhered to guidelines, etiquette, and a distinctive musical style. The guitar was the favored instrument for this endeavor, its melodic tones blending with romantic Spanish-influenced tunes and poetic Tagalog lyrics, creating an intimate atmosphere amidst balmy tropical evenings.
Apples
In rural Austria, rather than chocolate bonbons, a unique tradition involved using apples soaked in armpit sweat to win someone’s affection. Young women perform a ritual dance with slices of apple tucked into their armpits. Following the dance, each woman offers her apple slice to the man she desires, and he consumes it as a symbol of their connection. This ‘stinky’ tradition is better never revived.
16 Famous Comedians Whose Jokes Are Forbidden in Today’s World
Related: In the ever-evolving comedy landscape, societal norms and sensitivities play a significant role in shaping acceptable humor. Over the years, certain comedians who were once celebrated for their wit and sharp humor have found themselves in hot water for jokes now deemed offensive or inappropriate.
Here are 16 famous comedians whose jokes are forbidden in today’s world.
